Top 10 Issues When Checking Into Hotels After Late Night Events
Imagine for a moment that YOU just drove 750 miles. Or, perhaps you got up at 4 am to catch a flight at 6 or 7 am. You flew all day and arrive at an airport, rent a car and then drive hours to the town you will perform in that night.
You arrive at your destination, get out of your vehicle and spend an hour setting up sound and making sure you are good-2-go and do the show!
You do your show - the show was 90-minutes on stage, which most people do not realize is equal to 4.5 hours of energy one spends sitting in a chair in an office...
The high energy hypnosis show has now ended. You pack up the equipment.
It is now late and your body has no clue what timezone it is in. You are ready to sleep after a long ‘day!’
1. Tell the hotel that the performer/s may arrive very late (early) in the morning, so they will be aware and prepared.
Often an entertainer finally arrives so late (sometimes 5 or 6 a.m., after an all-night grad night or post-prom party) that the hotel has already completed their previous day’s check-in audit and have recorded the room as paid for but a “no-show”; this can confuse most hotel clerks. The performer is exhausted. They could give him a key and let him go to a room—but no, the performer ends up standing in the lobby for 45 minutes, at some “Oh my God!” hour, while they figure it all out.
2. Have someone visit the hotel and confirm payment in advance. Also, many hotels have a form that must be filled out and faxed back to them with the credit card # and a signature to cover the room.
Otherwise, the room was not paid for but only “held” on a credit card. This means they will want the performer to pay for the room upon arrival.
3. Be certain to put the performer’s name on the room reservation.
Often the room is reserved under the name of the card holder or the school’s name, but not the performer’s name. Entertainers do dozens of events a year and may have trouble keeping track of the name on the credit card that the room was reserved under; however, they do seem to remember their own names.
4. Please, always request a room with two beds.
Performers often travel with friends, kids, spouses they may not like, drivers, hitch hikers, etc. Most hypnotists are screaming Liberals, and though they do tend to lean far Left, the guys still have a problem sharing a bed with other guys, and most try to respect a woman they don’t have permission to share a pillow with. So please - reserve the room with two beds.
5. Request a NO-SMOKING ROOM, unless otherwise requested.
Most performers don’t smoke, nor do they expect to spontaneously combust, nor have they ever set a child on fire (though they may have threatened to do so on many occasions).
6. If at all possible, ask for a room that is in a quiet area so the performer can sleep in later.
Avoid rooms near entrance and exit doors that begin slamming shut as soon as the entertainer climbs into bed. Proximity to elevators can be noisy as well (drunks and children talking loud). La Quinta hotels are the exception. It is impossible to find a quiet room in most La Quinta hotels.
7. Please ask for a late check out.
Noon would be nice. 1 p.m. would be better a lot of the time.
8. Diesel trucks that warm-up for 15-30 minutes in the early morning are a huge noise problem.
If it is a motel, ask that the entertainer be placed in a room nowhere near this situation, if possible.
9. Request that chamber maids do not yell to each other across the courtyard.
If necessary, tell them that the performer actually works for Homeland Security in the INS department (Immigration and Naturalization Service).
10. Ask housekeeping to avoid running the vacuum in the hallways before 11 a.m.
If they do, Performer will walk into the hall and tell them to stop—NAKED!
11. Ask the hotel if there will be construction or a reason why plumbing will be turned off the days the room will be used.
I know it sounds so odd, but you’d be surprised how often an entertainer has lost out on a shower because of construction that was scheduled the day the performer was supposed to rise and depart.
Note: Most if this is written with humor added, but these issues are not made up. Everyone of them are real examples of things traveling entertainers learn to late. When they can be avoided, it is greatly appreciated!